NSA: We Created Bitcoin

In an astonishing admission, the NSA has admitted that it created Bitcoin and has been hiding in plain sight behind the pseudonym of its alleged founder – Satoshi Nakamoto. 

In response to a Freedom of Information (FOIA) request this month, the agency revealed why ‘Satoshi’ never claimed the tens of billions owed to him as the founder of the world’s largest digital currency.

Zerohedge.com reports: So we wrote the NSA and asked them, did you create Bitcoin? Hey, we are taxpayers. They work for us. Don’t forget that!

Their response was not surprising, they said “That’s Classified” –

While this is no surprise what we have started is a paper trail, hopefully that will lead to the revealing of the creator or creators of Bitcoin.  For those who are not from the financial services community, it is important to note why anyone would go through such trouble – it’s called due diligence.  When investors make investments they want to know every single detail about that investment.  Some of these DD questionnaires can be 100 pages they can have 300 questions!  It can take months, require multiple flesh meetings, they may bring in external advisers – it may seem like a circus but if someone is investing $100 Million then it’s really the least one can do.  Anyway, do Bitcoin investors really understand what they are getting themselves into?

This article deserves a full read:  Bitcoin Founder Satoshi Nakamoto was probably an NSA Employee — and the NSA may destroy Bitcoin

Bitcoin has a huge risk few consider: it can be destroyed overnight

My second NSA related theory and prediction, is that the NSA will be tasked to take down Bitcoin. While relative to the Internet, blockchain is very secure and effectively unhackable for a criminal group — it is in fact quite capable of being cheated and manipulated if you have enough computing power. NSA probably has plenty of computing power and expertise to take the Bitcoin blockchain down.  Why would the NSA want to take down Bitcoin? What NSA wants is irrelevant — it’s what government leaders want. And there are many scenarios that could lead to an order to take the Bitcoin blockchain down, with either minor disruption (letting it come back with just a few accounts robbed) or totally destroyed (stealing from many accounts and screwing it up so badly it is impossible to restore):

1. North Korea is a major owner, user, exploiter (for computer ransomware) of Bitcoin. As a sanction, punishment, or means of waging war, NSA could be ordered to rob accounts suspected of being NK owned.[1]

2. Bitcoin and many of its owners and advocates are Libertarian and anti-government. Bitcoin is an affront to national “fiat” currencies and handy for evading government rules and taxes. Big Government is very motivated to destroy Bitcoin.

3. Bitcoin has been used as ransom payments for computer hacking. I predict it will soon be used for human ransom as well. Rather than the high risk of transferring dollars, kidnappers may demand digital payment in Bitcoin. This could be a motivation, or excuse, for Big Government to take Bitcoin down.

China or Russia also have the computing power to take down Bitcoin, and may want to do so. Why? China has outlawed Bitcoin, may want to take North Korea’s wealth down a peg (keeping them more dependent on China), and could make a huge profit doing this.

The point is that it is 1) POSSIBLE and 2) NOT PROBABLE this is a low-probability high-impact event but one that any Bitcoin investor needs to understand – it is possible.  Just as it was very weird and surprising how Bitcoin suddenly rose to 20,000 it certainly is possible, that it can really go to zero.  Not because of selling but because the network can be brought down.  Whether NSA created Bitcoin or not is really irrelevant, they are the only agency in the world with the computing power and intellectual human capital (Cryptographers) capable of 1) understanding Bitcoin and 2) through their surveillance network identifying the real Satoshi if it was in fact NOT NSA and 3) Capable of actually monitoring Bitcoin users and identifying a real human based on Stylometry, a technique for analyzing big data.

To understand how the NSA really operates, they record both data and raw data such as encrypted and un-encrypted internet traffic IN BULK for later analysis.  The computing power of the NSA is ridiculous, China and Russia don’t come close, nor do any corporations.

Going back to their answer; what did we expect them to say?  Yes, we did it?  Well if they did it certainly would be easy to say it, they have thousands of active projects who cares about MONKEYROCKET.  NSA was created and NSA can be destroyed, if it no longer serves the purpose for which it was originally intended.  And practically if NSA was doing useful projects like Bitcoin it may be a benefit to their argument proving the need for their existence.  As most of us know, there are no real enemies anymore to fight, so having such a big and complex military intelligence apparatus is harder and harder to justify as the new generation of global idiots gets more and more peaceful and dumbed down.

So, we’ll appeal it, but will likely get another canned response.  In the meantime, we ask anyone who has any documents pertaining to the identity of Satoshi Nakamoto to come forward.